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" I'd Rather Die Thin, Than Live Fat."
i wonder what my world would be like if i was skinny. would i get mored dates? would i have more friends? all i know is taht i would be happy.

so my parents think im better. which is good. all i have to do is eat a little bit of fruit around them and they think im fine. but i really just want to be ..dead.
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so i leave for my cruise in less than two weeks! i dont know what to do.. im still fat as ever. im doing a weight watchers but minus a lot of points haha. today is like 12 points.. so far ive eaten 8. tomorrow is like 14 and sunday is 15. wish me luuuck!
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I cant stand feeling so.. soo upset about my weight. when i was depressed it all went away.. and now im depressed about my weight. and i hate it. i dont want to cut or burn so therefore i will be restricting and overexercising and stuff. i guess thats god but im just mad.
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I am so pissed off today. I failed my fast. and my brother is a fucking ass hole. he takes my stuff without asking and i just cant stand it anymore. i want to die.
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So school is going to be starting at the end of august, thinking about it, i only have about 2 months and 2 days until the first day of school. I need to be thin for school. In this two months, i need to exercise and fast a whole lot. I ordered Zantrex 3 yesterday so it should come tomorrow or something like that. I hope it works. Its a fat burner if i am correct.

I really want to be pretty and skinny for school. Hopefully i can make that happen.

Today is day one of my fast, i really hope i can do it. Today i woke up so early and I'm really hungry but i wont give in.. maybe ill just fill myself up with water or something of that nature.

Mood: depressed depressed

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So I am starting a fast tomorrow. I'm going to see how i do. I need to lose weight so bad. I ordered Zantrex 3 today. I should get it in about two days. I'm really excited to do so.


Mood: anxious anxious

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